There was this guy once, in Late Middle School and Early High School who crushed on me and my main friends and I was the unfortunate one who got to ride the schoolbus with him. And damn… He was scary. Well, everyone knew he liked us, he even stole my mothers jewelry from one of my friends to guilt another into a date! Such a mess… Well, he was an annoying gnat fluttering buzzing flying hanging around my side one day and tells me that if there was ever anything I needed, he’d get it for me. I of course scoffed at his ridiculous offer and he assured me “ANYTHING”. So, I thought a moment or two. I had just come out of a short relationship, my first relationship, the previous year and it was pretty common knowledge to everyone and I was still hurt from it… So, I figured I could use this guy and either get rid of him or get rid of my ex. Either way, I sort of won (Or so I figured at the time…) So, I turn to him and say, “Anything implies that you will commit a crime for me, right?” and he goes, “Yeah! I said anything, didn’t I?” And that affirmed my dastardly plan. So, I say, “Fine. If you do not complete this task, you may never speak to me again. And you cannot until the task is complete. Agreed?” Now he’s scoffing. I bet he thought I wanted him to scare somebody or steal something. Pfft! I’ve got bigger dreams than that! HA! “Agreed.” I grinned rather evilly and leaned in close - as close as I would - and said very lowly, “Kill ___________________. My ex boyfriend.” I then stood straight and he had this serious look on his face, like “Ffffffuck.” and I grinned, waved and rather joyously said, “Good luck.”
He couldn’t deliver… But now that I think about it, I had essentially hired someone to kill my ex. Wow… That was like… 8th grade! Jeeze.